It’s safe to say that it’s been a challenging year as a photographer.
I didn’t create as much as I wanted to this past year. In a way, it was because I ended putting more of my energy towards sewing and my designs than I did my photography. It’s not that I had no interest in making time for it, it’s that I almost found it draining.
In a bad way.
In the past year, I’ve experienced everything from models flaking to ghosting to escort issues. These are all quite new to me despite having done photography for a few years now. It’s only since changing scenery and deciding to photograph others again that I’ve managed to experience any of these. What sucks about it is experiencing it all within a one-year time span. Is that even normal?! I’ve pretty much hit that point where I don’t even know if a model will show up the day of the shoot. It’s never been like that before, but I suppose things change and I must be ready to make adjustments when it calls for it.
Each time it always left me completely gobsmacked. I honestly don’t know what it was that I was doing wrong. I always felt like my correspondence to models were filled with plenty of information and was as professional as possible from the very beginning. I provided links, examples, and even all of the photo shoot info in one message so that the model didn’t have to scroll through all of the messages. I even aim to answer all questions before questions are even asked leading up to the photo shoot. Isn’t more information better than no information? I won’t lie. It does upset me whenever it happens, and I do have to ask myself why it happens. I know better than to blame myself. All I can really do is try and prevent it from happening in the future. Learning as I go…
I did work with some beautiful beings before leaving my old setting. So leaving on a high note there left me with high expectations here, I suppose. It’s not to say that I didn’t work with some beautiful creatures since. I have. It’s just been few and far between but I’m still ever so grateful for their creativity.
Am I still pursuing photography? Yes, of course! I just think that where I want to be with it is going to take a bit longer than I had originally hoped for when it comes to photographing others. I might just focus more on my self-portrait work and working on improving my art. It’s a productive stress, but at least the concepts will be worked on instead of collecting dust in the back of my mind.
I do hope that I can work with some creatives this year. I believe that I can create some really awesome work with really awesome beings. I just need to find those who are just as passionate, if not more, about creating as I am.
Patience is a virtue, right?